Wednesday, January 21, 2009

A little update

I wish I could say things are better now than they were when I made my previous post... but alas. I went back to the hospital yesterday and got a "real" cast, but I still have to go back in one week. Due to the swelling I have this cast will get loose so I will have to have it replaced. They haven't ruled out surgery yet, and they say I will have a cast for 6-8 weeks and then I will have to have some physical therapy.

I've decided to go to the police station today, at least to make a statement. My sister in law is going to take me - she was a main witness. I am undecided as of yet on pressing charges. The thought of having to go to court and having this dominate my life even further for a while is rather depressing and I'm not ready to decide if that is what I want. It seems that I have a fight on my hands, whether I like it or not. The girl who did this seemed remorseful at first, but that seems to have quickly faded and I've since learned that she may have been convicted of this same offense before.

I called the bar where everything occured yesterday morning and spoke to the owner who took down my number and said he would call me back. After I left the hospital yesterday I actually went in and attempted to try and speak with the manager or owner of the bar, but was turned away. I can't believe that they turned away a girl with a huge cast on! Apparently, they have heard many different stories and that is all they would say. I don't really think it matters whose story is correct, because they had only one bouncer working (on the busiest night I have ever seen at this particular bar no less) and he wasn't even in the bar, he was downstairs by the door. I'm fairly certain that they were over capacity and the lack of security is sickening. What would have happened if I had been injured even worse, or died? What if it happens again? I still haven't even gotten my promised return phone call.

The thing that bothers me the most about this whole thing is how it effects my son. I can't take care of him during the day, he has been with his Oma since Saturday. I guess he started pulling up on the furniture, and I missed it. What else am I going to miss? His first words, his first steps? What if his first word is Oma? He came home last night to sleep in his own bed and his Oma came back to pick him up this morning and he was reaching for her and didn't want to sit with me. I don't think I can bear this for 6-8 weeks. My mother in law has poly cystic liver disease, so she can't take care of him full time because she is very sick, which means I am going to have to put him in daycare with strangers. To top it off, I'm not exactly sure where we are going to come up with money for childcare. It's been hard enough already with prescriptions, crutches, and Matt having to take time off work.

Aaaaaaaaaanyways, I didn't mean for this to turn into a big complain fest. I've been trying really hard to not let this get me down too much, but the anger that I've been trying to squash is just not squashing very well today.

Oh, but I did get a pink cast! The ONE awesome thing about all of this :)

I will update again soon, when I know more about what is going to happen. In the meantime, I want to try to get back to my regular activities as best as I can. Just for fun, here are a few pics of us before we left home on Saturday night, all dressed up and ready for fun dancing times.


Shauna said...

You look beautiful!! And I am so sorry to hear about your ankle! Talk about the wrong place at the wrong time!! I hope you have a speedy recovery, but the pink is so cute!

Becca Seitz, LAc said...

I'm not sure how you feel about it, so if you're not into it, ignore this post ;) but I would highly suggest getting acupuncture to help it heal. I'm an acupuncturist and when my brother broke his foot (a Jones Fracture) the doctor wanted to do surgery because this type of fracture doesn't usually heal because of a lack of blood to the area. My brother asked if he could try acupuncture first, then if it didn't work he would do surgery. The doctor gave the go ahead and gave us 4 weeks. When my brother went back for xrays after 4 weeks the doctor said that it was healing nicely and he wouldn't need surgery! Do whatever your doctor suggests you should do, but consider adding in acupuncture to help it heal more quickly.

Good luck with your ankle!

sassypackrat said...

Sounds like the bar was in the wrong about not have enough security and now they are trying to protect themselves. Unfortunate situation for you. Best wishes!

ittybittybirdy said...

Oh Chelsea I am so sorry to read about your frustration~ Try each day to find the positive side of things~ and not let this consume your happy spirit. If I were in your neck of the woods I would be at your home everyday helping you take care of little Jude!
I really think you should try the acupuncture too! I tried it for my jaw because I couldn't find relief in modern medicine and well it changed my life!
As for going to court~ if you decide to I would encourage you to do it not for yourself but for others who might find themselves in your same position.
Bars being over capacity s a huge issue and jeopardizes the safety of everyone. In school for interior design we studied these issues and so many times the places that burnt down with everyone in them had over capacity issues for a long time and no one ever bothered to bring it up.

Keep your smile Chelsea~
Chelsea Ann

Melissa said...

i would press charges....

aimee! said...

Baba's is a very liberal place and situations like that rarely, rarely happen there, which is why they have never needed a lot of security. I just would hate for Babas to be blamed for something like this as they do do a great job as a bar but the occasional patron acts like an asshole and ruins it for everyone else.

Also, I have pressed charges for assault before and the guy pleaded guilty and thus no court. It could happen..

T.Allen-Mercado said...

Bars and nightclubs are insured for these things-get an attorney, at best you will be awarded something for your medical expenses, lost wages and pain and suffering. This is awful, I'm so sorry. said...

AWW- I hope you get everything resolved & feel better soon!

Whimsical Creations said...

You guys look so cute! SOrry the night ended like that. Hope everything works out!!!

Beth Perry said...

Girl you look hot in those pics! YOW! :P
And you know what, you need to MAKE that bar talk to you. Who have witnesses and you should NOT have to pay for any of those hospital bills. Yeah, it sucks that it will take up more time...but, look what all you are missing in the meantime b/c of it. YOu shouldn't have to pay $$ for your losses. That is just my two cents.
Keep your head up, things will get better. And keep me posted! ;P

Adirondack Metal Designs said...

Hi. I think you should consult a lawyer and follow up with this. You may save others from something in the future if your case helps to enforce laws and improve security. You should have a lawyer so you cna find out all the laws and codes that may have been violated. Yes it may turn into a bigger deal, but it may be worth it in the end. As for missing time with your baby, that's very sad. Rather than sending Jude to daycare, maybe you could hire a mommy's helper to come there so you are there with him!! A baby sitter in your home would let you be there withoput having to do the work. Best wishes. Also, you looked great before going out. Pink is a great color on you, no wonder why you wanted a pink cast. Keep us posted along your journey.

Naomi said...

Really scary that the girl might be a habitual brawl-starter... you definitely need to testify if that's the case, who knows what could happen to her next unsuspecting victim!

Your son will always love you, remember that.

jemm_shine said...

Just from knowing of the crowd that the individual that did this is from I know that it is not a rare occurrence. It really isn't any of my business but it truly upsets me when things like this happen to a friend. On top of that she will continue to do this because she thinks she can get away with it.

With that said, it is not your responsibility to stop this from happening in the future. If you think that pressing charges will be a benefit to you than do it. If you think the stress involved with that would outweigh the positives than don't.

Whatever you decide, I hope that it will be the best option for you.

I am so proud with how positive you have been trying to be!

Chelsea Ling said...

Aimee I get that this rarely happens at babas, but I had to crawl outside on my hands and knees and 1) they didnt help me, or even ask what had happened 2) the bouncer was outside on the sidewalk and how can they provide any security from there? it doesn't matter if it "never" happens in this situation obviously 3) they won't even give me the time of day 4) they were violating liquor licensing codes and there is video and photo proof.

We don't have any savings and childcare costs are really, really expensive. I don't think it's fair that I am the victim and have to deal with that too.

Don't get me wrong, babas is my fave bar, but I think it is completely assholish to refuse to talk to the girl with the broken ankle when she comes in, and ive phoned twice.

Plaidfuzz said...

You better believe I would press charges. People who hit first and ask questions later are idiots, and it is lucky she didn't do more damage.

Lily said...

I am actually speechless at this whole thing. I mean I thought this kind of stuff never really happened. I am torn on the pressing charges thing. part of me says nail her ass but another part knows that will make it a bigger part of your life than it has to be. I think I'd swing towards the let it go and move on side

Sweetina said...

Chelsea, I feel so sorry about his horrible incident in your life.
I think that the best thing is to write a list of how this will effect the lives of you,you baby, hubby and other family members.
And for how long.
A difficult as it must be not to become angry (because you were violated in the incident and then again when the manager brushed you off)..
It's best to make a case on the restitution that needs to be paid to you, because of all the money you must spend, and changes, inconveniences this has brought to your present life and loss of pay that you and your husband have/will occur.
If you go this route,Chels, then you will be less stressed because the hard facts will be right there on paper.
The person who did this to you needs to pay restitution and given court ordered anger management help. (at the least)
I am not certain what the restaurant needs to do..but certainly make up for any neglect to secure or help you when you had to crawl out of there.
Breathe in and know we are all here behind you,Hon.

MollyandIzzie said...

You look sooo pretty - at least you got a pink cast! x x x

Emily ~ Little Window Shoppe said...

So sorry to hear about your ankle! Way to stay strong throughout all of this. I do love that pink cast too. :)

Ele at abitofpinkheaven said...

You look so pretty. Sorry about your cast! I'm having a great time surfing through your blog!